You don’t need to buy him or her gifts or give them a foot rub every morning.
(Although they would probably like that, too.)
You do, however, need to pay attention to the words coming out of your mouth.
It’s amazing what a simple compliment can do to lighten the mood and grow love.
But what types of things are the most important to say to your partner everyday?
Making your partner feel loved, valued, respected, and adored is so important."
The Castons told me about their powerful practice for sharing love with one other.
Once you’re finished, your spouse spends the next 60 seconds sharing what they love about you."
According toJessica Elizabeth Opert, love and relationship coach, “Saying ‘I love you’ is important.
However, it can become a meaningless salutation over time.
Push your boat out and give your partner one reason you love them every day.
But don’t just tell your partner the same reasons every day mix it up a little.
once you nail a healthy list to work with, start vocalising them.”
He washes the dishes while you get the kids ready for bed.
He takes the trash out and you sweep the floors.
That’s why it’s so critical to say “thank you” on a daily basis.
For example, ‘It is so nice that you finished the dishes.
I felt very appreciated.’
‘Your goofy voices are so nice at the end of the day.
Very amusing.'"
Opert agrees, adding, “It is not your job to be their sole fountain of self worth.
However, we can add and detract from people’s self image and self-esteem.
Relationships are about contribution.
People who are feeling better about themselves individually make for better partners.”
But he won’t know unless you tell him.
So verify to share how amazing you think he is.
How can I help you?
When he offers to help me, it strengthens our relationship because I know I am supported.
The Castons recommended checking in with your partner on a daily basis.
Those five words (‘What can I do to help?')
show values of empathy and collaboration in the relationship and can wipe away any resentment that is building."
How are you doing?
Have you ever gotten into a fight with your partner that seems to come out of nowhere?
It’s happened to me many times.
My husband and I are walking our dog, talking about dinner, and suddenly, we’re fighting.
How are you?"
it opens up a channel of communication and connection between us.
Instead of fighting, we deepen our relationship.
Not to listen is to build resentment, but careful, honest listening brings healing."
Life is so much sweeter when you know your spouse has your back!"
Be intentional with your words
The power of words works both ways.
And it can be far too easy to find faults with your partner rather than noticing the positives.
That’s why it’s so important to be intentional about how you speak to each other.
Money put it like this: “Thriving relationships are built on the foundation of being intentional.
Otherwise you end up like everyone else, married and miserable or divorced and desperate.”
Your relationship is in danger long before you hit the 50/50 of positive to negative Interactions."
While loving words will bring you closer to your partner, criticism has the opposite effect.
Audrey Hope, a celebrity relationship expert, shared the dangers of criticism with me.
“Criticism is a deadly weapon, so the opposite of this energy is nurturing positive energy.
Be mindful of criticism and harsh words.
Never ever put your mate down, even when angry.”
Hershenson recommended checking in with your partner at night.
Take time out of your day to make the emotional connection a habit," she said.
Dr. Bash agreed with the idea of a nightly ritual.
“This will keep the romance alive in the long haul.”
And if it’s not a text, it’s an in-person compliment. "
Opert weighed in with another great idea: “Align it with other daily habits you already have.
Do you two brush your teeth together every night?
Do you have a weekly dinner date, just the two of you?
Start with that.”
They can create a rift between you or they can forge an unbreakable bond.
