A relationship is like a plant it needs water, sunshine, and good soil to grow.

A neglected plant will likely die, and the same can be said of a romantic partnership.

We make assumptions about their thoughts, likes, and dislikes.

Couple hugging

Another thing that happens is that important discussions only come up during conflict.

This is why a relationship check-in can be useful.

Defining a relationship check-in: What can it do for you?

couple talking about relationship

Am I meeting your emotional needs?

Is there something on your mind that’s bothering you?

Have I done anything lately that upset you?

Are you happy with how our relationship is?

These are some of the questions you’ve got the option to ask your spouse and vice versa.

It’s also built more trust, appreciation, and connection between them.

For some couples, a relationship check-in might sound daunting.

Isn’t talking about your relationship a dangerous idea?

Won’t it spark arguments that aren’t necessary?

If done incorrectly, it might.

Here’s the right way to do it.

If your partner has something negative to share, listen to them without judgment or defensiveness.

Relationship check-ins allow you to form a dynamic connection with one another.

It might also help to start and end the conversation on positive notes, according to Stockhausen and Milton.

“Appreciation is the secret sauce of a great relationship,” they note on theirwebsite.

Setting a timer on the conversation is a good idea, too, per the couple.

Don’t wait forsigns that your relationship might be in troubleto begin relationship check-ins.