Every relationship has its issues they’re bound to appear at some point.
Psychology Todayhas laid out the 12 patterns, complete with the definitions of them.
Although the process is not an easy one, growth only comes in the face of true honesty.
Introvert/extrovert
The introvert/extrovert dynamic is a more common label.
One partner often likes to be alone or spenddate nightsin a quiet setting.
To reach a compromise, the partners can take turns planning dates.
Approach/withdraw
With the approach/withdraw label, one partner is more comfortable discussing their feelings .
Meanwhile, the withdrawer feels claustrophobic with their other half’s constant affection.
Love can show up in various ways; it isn’t always expressed via physical touch .
Both partners should discuss the ways that they show and feel love.
Both thought processes should be appreciated for the roles they serve in the relationship.
Criticize/defend
The criticize/defend dynamic pits partners against one another.
The time away can help you reflect on whether their critiques are valid.
If you’re the criticizer, think about what exactly you want your partner to know.
Is it something worth bringing up or is your annoyance fleeting?
While one partner hyperbolizes the issues within a relationship, the other partner downplays them.
Meanwhile, the molehill partner should adopt an empathetic viewpoint to understand their partner’s POV.
Chances are, the two of you may be looking at issues unrealistically.
After a while, pent-up anger and frustration may explode over something that is actually a molehill.
Examine why you both feel discomfort expressing your emotions.
If something is bothering you, schedule a time with your partner to discuss the state of your union.
Once you start to approach shaky territory in your relationship more, having those necessary conversations will feel natural.
Mutual blame
The mutual avoidance archetype is the direct opposite of the mutual blame one.
With this label, the partners must realize that they’re not at war with one another.
Spender/saver
PerMarket Watch, financial issues contribute to many relationship endings.
Many couples may find that they fall into the spender/saver dynamic.
One person spends freely while the other is conservative about money.
A divergent mindset about money should be discussed at the beginning of a relationship.
When budgeting for non-essentials, examine the price you put on certain aspects of life.
Is eating out worth that much to you or can you live with cooking at home frequently?
To many people, life experiences are worth paying for.
It’s up to the couple to discuss the value they place on things.
Teacher/student
While debating about things within the relationship, don’t adopt the teacher/student dynamic.
For the other person in a conventional/unconventional relationship, they may cherish spontaneity in a relationship.
While one partner doesn’t want much excitement, the other takes pleasure in adventure.
Both partners can learn to strike a balance between predictability and excitement.
Assurance is knowing that your partner is the safe haven, not the routine you’ve created.
Additionally, finding joy in the quieter aspects of life can help you slow down and enjoy your partner.
